Our Boy

Our Boy
In California

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Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Just a Thought

As many of you know November is National Adoption Month. It is such an honor for me to announce that on November 16th, 7 days prior to Alexander being home for a full year - he will legally be ours! I am so thankful that the Lord gave me this beautiful child and love him more then I ever could have imagined. While I am thrilled with this adoption November is a sad month for me. Alexander is a success story for everyone involved but there are so many children out there that are just waiting. I understand that not everyone is called to adopt and I respect that, but I ask that you look in your heart, pray and ask the Lord if this could be for you. You may be surprised at His answer!
That all being said I want to share with you what has really been on my heart lately. While there are hundreds of thousands of kids in the system waiting to be adopted, I think back to California about the kids that are not waiting for someone to come and take them home. Every time I visited Alexander in his nursing home in California I saw the same 4 parents each visit. Yes! Four! Were there only a hand full of kids in his facility you ask? NO! I cannot say the number of kids there, probably around 35. What is really on my heart is these children that have been born "sick" and are dumped in a nursing care facility because the parents are too scared to take care of them. Guess what? I don't buy it! You do not want to be inconvenienced that is all there is to it  period. Those of you that know anything about Alexander know that he has several medical issues, many of which can become fatal at any moment. Now I understand that not everyone is comfortable with that kind of child, I respect that. However, what excuse can be used not to visit your child?? The nurses and doctor are there if a problem arises. Inconvenience that is the problem. Here is my sincere plea to you - while there are way more kids out there then there are homes, if you selfishly do not put your child up for adoption people like me will never know they exist. If you are too scared, busy, selfish or whatever else to be a parent because your child did not come out perfect (who is perfect anyway), voluntarily terminate your rights so that child has a fighting chance at finding its true parents. I honestly could sit here and list the children in Alexander's nursing home that I went and sat with, read to, played with, prayed over because their parents were never anywhere around. Guess what you are NOT a parent! It is my opinion that these so called parents should have neglect charges pressed against them. Yes I know their children are safe and taken care of, but what they need is to be loved on and given a family. You should be ashamed of yourselves! I pray that the Lord will instill in you the right decision to make regarding your child but even more importantly I pray that by the grace of God your child will not know the kind of coward you are!

Monday, October 31, 2011

The Journey

Ok, so now I am back in California and this time is the last time! Yes! This is the time I bring my son home! I brought my oldest son with me to help me on the long long trip home. Meeting with the social workers was horrible as usual, they don't have their paperwork done and tell me that Alexander may not leave. I immediately get his attorney on the phone who lets them know that indeed Alexander will be coming home, the plane tickets have already been purchased. Now that that is settled all I have to do is get through the additional training that they are having my oldest son go through in case there is an emergency. It has been a very long day and I am wondering where we are sleeping - oh yay in the abandoned hospital again. My son and I head over there only for him to inform me that there is somebody sleeping in the "lobby" on the couch. Now mind you it is late and dark. I do not believe my child, I think that he is trying to harass me so I tell him to just go to sleep. He wakes me up and informs me that he cannot sleep when there is someone else in there, and I should agree with him but I am mentally and physically exhausted. I decide that the only way I am going to get this child to go to sleep is if I actually get out of bed and investigate. HOLY COW - there is a man that appears to be- highly intoxicated, homeless, and possibly dead sleeping on the couch complete with empty liquor bottles next to him. You have got to be kidding me but should I really be surprised!?
I decide that the only logical thing to do is poke the man to see if he is deceased. He doesn't move! Now I am really freaking out! I go over to the main hospital and what was there solution? They brought over a stick to poke him with! Long story short, the man thank God was not dead just very very drunk. The cops were called and he was taken away.
So now it is time to do what I came here to do - complete my 48 hours alone with my boys and prove to everyone that I can take care of Alexander and then get the heck out of there! The time went by very slowly but without any issues. We had a "family suite" that we had to stay in for the duration of time. We did not have a bathroom, TV, or radio. We spent many hours playing Monopoly which was the only form of entertainment we could find. My son beat me at every single game - just a little salt in the wound!
When we finally got to the airport, security was so concerned about Alexanders wheelchair that we almost missed our flight. Alexander did great on both planes and finally at 10pm we landed in Ohio. We were home!

Sunday, June 26, 2011

The Alarming Shower

So here I am in California sleeping in an abandoned hospital that is just totally spooky! When I am in different time zones I always try to keep my body on the same schedule, like I am back at home. It does seem to help with the time change. Needless to say, I wake up at the same time except there it is much earlier. I awoke at 4am California time so that I could shower and get over to the hospital before my boy awoke. They do not have accommodations there for parents to sleep. I go outside, greet the morning (hey wait it is still night), go back to my room and prepare my things for my shower. It is still pitch black outside and my room isn't much lighter even with the light on. Now this bathroom is not like your bathroom at home, or at a hotel. This bathroom was used for kids in wheelchairs that need adaptive seating when bathing. That being said the shower is the whole bathroom. There is no curtain, wall, or anything else to offer any sense of privacy. Ok, that is awkward but I just want to shower and get the heck out of this run down place. I take my soap, shampoo, conditioner, and towel into the bathroom with me. I decide I will keep my flip flops on! On this trip I have not brought my own towel but I did remember to grab some hospital towels while visiting my son the night before, they will have to do. I proceed to take my shower, and expecting only cold water am very relieved that it actually is nice and hot. I tell myself that I am going to try to forget that I am all out in the open and just enjoy this shower and allow it to totally wake me up and refresh me. Sounded good in theory.......then it happens....I have my hair totally covered with shampoo when I hear a God awful noise that I am praying isn't what I think it is - the fire alarm! I stop the water and look around and there are red lights flashing everywhere, you have got to be kidding me!!!!! Now there are still oxygen tanks stored in this facility so I decide I had better get out of there like right now! I grab my towel and my phone and run out of the bathroom, out my bedroom door, through the hospital corridor (lights and sirens going), finally out of the building. I have wrapped myself in my towel only to discover that it doesn't quite fit! Oh hell, these towels are for the kids in the hospital not some fairly overweight 5ft something tall adult. I try to calm myself down, after all, I have escaped from the building and if the fire gets to that oxygen, well, I am much safer out here. When I don't see any flames I do debate going in to throw on some clothes but I decide it is not worth the risk. After about 3 minutes of standing in the parking lot, lights and sirens louder than you have ever heard in your life I notice that no one is coming. No one! What the heck am I supposed to do stand here pretty much naked waiting for Jesus? Now I have my cellphone with me so I call over to the hospital, although I can see it I am certainly not walking over there with only half of a towel! I tell them that the fire alarm is going off and they state that yes, they can hear it (hello! do you think you might want to investigate, I dunno? Just a thought)I remind myself over and over that I am a Christian and that I need to keep my composure even if I am half naked over here. I kindly ask them if they can either call the fire department (which I thought these alarms did automatically) or please come check the building and turn the alarm off. They say they are on their way. Now here I am outside in the parking lot, shampoo still in my hair and now also my eyes, standing in a towel that would maybe fit around my 5 year old son and they send three young guys out to investigate. YOU HAVE TO BE KIDDING ME!! I am humiliated but what can ya do, I know that I have to be sure there is no fire before going back in the building. The guys go in to check out the building when a car races into the parking lot, great let me just greet them while I am naked and soaking freaking wet. It is the director of the property, not the nursing home itself but the property. He asks me if I am ok and tells me that he knew the alarm went off. I should not have asked him, but for some reason I did, how did you know the alarm went off, weren't you at home? Once again I should not have asked him! He explains (and not even gently explains) that at home he was watching the surveillance videos and he saw me come running out of the building. Now I must admit I was very embarrassed but figured what can you do, until he told me that he knew there must have been a problem because I came running down the hall naked....that's right - I hadn't put my towel on yet! Now lets think - you can afford video surveillance but you are having me stay in an abandoned hospital, what the hell kind of sense does that make?

Saturday, June 25, 2011

I'm Sleeping Where??

So normally when I visit Alexander I get to stay in the guest apartment. Now my first time there I was a little discouraged because the walls were dirty, there was no heat or air, the shower was as soon as you open the front door and it wasn't in a bathroom, just right there in the entrance way! Ok, weird, but I have never been to California, maybe their designs are just different than ours. I should not have complained!!!
The next trip when I arrive in California I am curious when they tell me that I am sleeping at the "16 bed"? Now please keep in mind, I am not a flyer. I get massive stomach aches a week before I even know I have to fly, yet alone when I am on the plane. Going from Ohio to California requires basically two three and a half hour flights - yay for me.
One of the social workers at Alexanders facility explains to me that the 16 bed is the old hospital that they used before they built the new one. Ok, can't be that bad I am thinking, maybe they transformed it into apartments or something. Either case my stomach hurts and I just want to go to this 16 bed so that I can put down my luggage and use the bathroom. She gives me the key to the hospital and then another key to my room. I should have known there was trouble when I have to get a key to a hospital! Now if I can find and figure out how to upload the photos I will, but when I tell you this was an abandoned old hospital I mean just that, an abandoned old hospital. First off the main doors didn't lock, so I am not sure why she gave me a key. Second there were old hosp beds in the hallway, complete with old equip, tons of dust, and just spookiness, need I say more? I go into my room which thank you Jesus has a lock on it, and immediately went to the bathroom. It was filthy and honestly, I could wait no more! I proceed to use the restroom (and please remember I have a horrible stomach ache and have had one since I left home), finish my business and YES, you guessed it - no toilet paper! Oh my goodness, are you kidding me? There were also no paper towels. So here I am sitting with nothing and this time I have traveled alone so it isn't like I can yell for someone to help me! Not going to tell you how I managed to clean myself after this, but I am sure you can come up with some cleaver ideas! If this is how my trip is starting, what the heck is next?.......

Wow has it been a while!

Ok, as you can see it has been a long time since I blogged. I will try to bring this up to date now that my precious Alexander is home!! We had many many obstacles that stood in our way of bringing this child home. The biggest was that no one in LA county had ever placed a medically fragile child out of state. The next was that our agency had never received an out of state child. Our agency handled it like a pro, LA not so much. Too much confusion, no one knew what the other person was doing. It honestly would take me years of writing to tell you about all the red tape! Anyone that is either going through the situation/about to start the process/or just wants to know more about it is welcome to email me djohnson135@yahoo.com and I will explain and help all that I can.
I could sit here and write about all the trying times that led me to tears and all the delays (and boy were there many), or I could write about all the long flights (I hate to fly), but I will not write about the sad or trying times. You see all of that is behind us and our precious boy is home and thriving. In an effort to bring you all up to date, and to focus on the craziness of it all, I will tell you some of the more humorous events that happened along this crazy journey.

Saturday, January 23, 2010

Bringing Alexander Home

Hello and thank you for taking time to read my blog. The purpose of my writing is to explain the journey that my family and I are making to bring home Alexander. In this blog you will learn about myself, my husband, our children, and our soon to be son, Alexander who currently resides in a nursing home in California.

My name is Dawn, I am 35 years old and have four biological children. My husband, Joe, has two biological children. We have no children together and debated trying to get pregnant. We thought about this for a long while and went back and forth with the decision. For some reason the Lord led me to www.adoptuskids.org and there I saw such tragedy. I looked over hundreds upon hundreds of children that were currently in the states care. These children were from all over. I remember looking at them with my daughter and we both cried. The majority of these children were either teenagers or had severe medical issues. It was at that moment that my mind was made up. The Lord had already blessed me with four beautiful healthy children, and my husband as well. I spoke to my husband and he felt the same. We decided that at some point this was the way that we would go.

We were not immediately ready to start this journey and had several obstacles to overcome before we could even think about beginning. Finally we both knew that it was time to start preparing for everything and I contacted a local agency to begin our foster to adopt classes. I was very excited about this challenge and remembered the website that I had originally looked at. I knew that it was way too soon to start looking at "our" child, but thought that I would get a feel for the children that needed homes.

It was then, in September of 2009 that I locked eyes with Alexander, a three year old boy who resided in a nursing home. As I read a little more about him I learned that Alex had never lived in a home. This was his home. Yes the nurses there no doubt loved him, but he had no family, no place to call home, just a bed in the nursing home.

How is it that this precious, blonde hair, blue eyed baby had no one that wanted to just hold him, love him, and take him home?

I have no idea what called me to Alex, well yes I do, it was the Lord. There were tons of kids on the website that needed homes, all of them precious like my boy, but he was different. It was almost as if at that moment I knew that he was meant to be my son, and so the journey began.......